“You are what your deep, driving desire is."
If it’s truth you seek don’t give up. The answers might surprise you but they are yours to be lived.
It seems we grow up wanting to be adults and then when we get there, we let the expectations of society – others – dictate who we become and what we do. We settle for society’s “truth” rather than let our own truth come out and be lived.
We bury our pain and say, “I’m fine.” We think others are happier and we’re alone – we’re not!
How often does someone say to us, “How are you?” And we reply, “I’m fine.” We each then go our separate ways, having played an all too familiar game.
We’re not so fine all the time but we fear showing weakness or even fear.
Above the clouds and higher still
in wing-ed thought I fly.
The world a speck and smaller still
light lost in darkening sky.
To some a street, others a tunnel
the answer now I know.
Strange familiar is all around
a scent of home long left.
A comforting touch, spirit to mine
guides me to the Creator.
I tried to bow but not allowed
without taking all of heaven with me.
I’m sure for you, just like for me, there are many times when things don’t go as you planned or at least hoped for. I’m writing this post right in the middle of one of these occasions for me and, to be honest, I’m quite upset.
We know we don’t control everything that happens in our lives. But when they’re really important, even life-changing, when your plans fall through our reaction is to get angry and even lash out, in whatever form that might take. I know I used a few choice words today that I don’t normally use.
Midnight prowls my cat
for a mouse in a vent.
Catch it before I scream,
before it skitters from under the counter.
But it will come now that you’re gone
because it delights
in your passing.
I don’t have your speed.
Old age took you.
None of us outlive it.
Even with nine lives
it stalked you all along.
Your snuggles and purrs
I feel them, hear them still.
Meal companion and watchdog,
you ruled our sanctuary.
The house echoes
with your ghostly call
and will haunt me until I’m done.
Why don’t mice ever age?
With courage look out at all you can be if you first trust the heart that knows.
We hear so often to trust your gut or your instincts or your heart. But what does that really mean? I want to first touch on why we don’t.
How many of us find it easier to “follow the crowd” and do what they do? I suspect we do it more often than we’re willing to admit. But isn’t it easier to “be like everyone else?” Then we don’t stand out and we’re accepted. These are very important but not the way we should live our lives.
Disappointment,
thou art a beast
that slays the trying heart
and crushes rising hope.
The heart is defenseless,
yet you strike
with loud derision
at its unattainable efforts.
Go, I say.
And yet it’s me
that gave rise to this creature
that attacks and thunders in glee.
Stay then
for you are mine.
I am both heart and beast.
The heart must one day triumph.
Wrap it up, cushioned
against damage from handling.
Hide the tender beat
from pain not lived
(but just in case it comes).
Protect it.
Massage it.
Handle with care.
And then safely look out,
with caution hold tightly
to the package you guard.
Slip through the world
hoping you never
need to unwrap
your heart to love.