I’m one of those people who far too easily give up on those who are close. And to be completely honest, I don’t let them in at the time they could become even more valuable as friends.
I think we too often let opportunities to get to know better those we come in contact with. This includes at work as well as any social gatherings or neighborhood get-togethers. We are given opportunities to matter to others and we (I) let them pass.
Why do we do this? Is it because we are fearful of getting too close? Getting hurt? Or fearing others wouldn’t like us if “they really knew us?”
I have one friend left from high school and I’ve allowed us to lose touch. Although, when we do see each other once every 10 years, we pick up as if time has not passed. Same with my early adult years when I was learning to be self-sufficient and then eventually got married. We moved away and I let those friendships slide as well.
And now with retirement upon me, there are those in the office I keep at arm’s length, again not wanting to become too close because we are at different places in our lives.
We hold off when we should let in.
Each person we come in contact with becomes a part of us as we do of them. When we experience life together we are life together. And we need to, I need to, experience these people more fully and allow them to become friends and, more importantly, to be their friend.
We can help one another. We don’t have to block people out from who we really are. Heavens, I suspect they see us for who we are more than we realize – and they still want to be with us and become even closer.
Who else finds it difficult to let others in? I do. And I need to learn to be open to this and not fear to be who I know myself to be. Sure, there’s risk to this. Sure we or they might move away (life happens). But we shouldn’t bottle ourselves off and not allow friendships to grow.
My goal is to open myself up and to allow people in. To begin to enjoy the moments we find ourselves in. To risk taking a chance and being caring.
Who knows, maybe a lifelong friend awaits us.