Poems

You may not know
the answers you seek.
You may not live
from your heart out.

But you do know
that you wish to be happy
and you know
self-honesty and self-being
are your ways.

Wish to know
your hidden spirit.
Wish to live
your heart calling.

Then you will be
who you must be.
Then you will live
you for others.

Each day we strive for self and home
to make our lives complete.
But on one day, a coming day,
our hearts for others beat.

It is a day we know as Christmas
that we wish happiness for others.
As this day comes we act from love
and think and do, one for another.

And if once a year we can do so much
what about the remaining days?
Could we not do one for all
and give each other praise?

On this coming day, this day of hope
I wish each of you happiness
for each day you live this coming year
and I wish for you to be blessed.

An endless season starts.
We all feel it’s demands.
No one an island 
as the season grips us all.

Not all who begin
will see it close.
For reasons unknown
it swoops erratically.

Within the brackets of this time
humanity is afraid.
Exposed, vulnerable, and screaming
at this season of fear that invades.

Our new bravery
demands we say, “We’re fine,
illness cannot happen here.”
…and then it does.

This season will cost much
but raise hope
until, together again,
we enter the season of thanksgiving.

I am that little boy

hiding behind the woodpile

with his dog,  crying.

I am that little girl

in front of the mirror

with her doll, broken.

We are the children

who only wanted

to be loved, but weren’t.

We played superheroes

so no one would harm us

except you, and you did.

We wanted to be cared for

maybe loved

but never ignored, which you did.

We learned to “be seen and not heard”

and are that still

because we don’t know how to love.

A smile, a hug

maybe “I love you”

would have helped the child

you didn’t see.

I walked away

from people who cared.

Long of leg and sure of foot

I swathed the sidewalk clear.

My spirit lived one hundred feet

in a pit that deepened.

Walled face, brick by brick

blocked another’s entry.

A dark reflection, mine,

I won’t look, I scare myself.

Why do I stride so fast?

To prove I exist but don’t matter?

A face comes that knows me.

Quick, duck.  This store will hide me.

Danger passes but I wish

that someone chased me, just once.

Pause.

No one pursued again.

A friendly voice is faster

than racing legs that want to stop.

No one called.

Walk until…

The bell nailed on the house.

Distant laughter of screaming children.

The two would soon be one

as a wrinkled hand

grabbed the chain

and whipped it furiously.

Pavlov’s dog re-imagined

in the speedy response to lunch

the bell demanded.

Parents ring and are ignored.

Grandma rings a command.

How can children tell

grandma’s touch?

With what power

does she whip the clapper?

This bell, a magic bell,

from grandma’s heart to theirs,

a ringing bond of love.

The bell mounted on our wall

it’s work of calling wayward children

is over, except for the memories.

Adult children tear up

when they visit

and remember fondly

grandma’s call.

Silent now the bell vibrates

waiting for the next round of grandkids.

Who is it I am?

And because I don’t know

how do I find out

who I am

and what I’m to do?

I look at the bounty

of those I would be like

and know I am meager

of self and belongings.

Take a step forward?

But the cliff is there

reminding me there’s nowhere

to put my foot down

without falling.

It is the fall I fear,

the great unknowing.

I am my own

but wishful tendrils remain

of the safe life

I once had.

Resolute, I close my eyes,

reach out with a foot

and step,

fearing the fall

but fearing more to stay.

Life, you are mine,

catch me.

Above the clouds and higher still

in wing-ed thought I fly.

The world a speck and smaller still

light lost in darkening sky.

To some a street, others a tunnel

the answer now I know.

Strange familiar is all around

a scent of home long left.

A comforting touch, spirit to mine

guides me to the Creator.

I tried to bow but not allowed

without taking all of heaven with me.